This is a religious rant... I know most of you don't share my religious beliefs, so don't feel obligated to respond. I'm not trying to debate Christianity or anything else, but just to get this off my chest. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'm really struggling over the issue of conversion. Well, I'm not really struggling- I've got an opinion already. However, I feel the need to struggle with it and I've decided to let Malachi (who is by for the more religious and more levelheaded of the two of us) decide what our family does. For those unfamiliar with this issue as it relates to Messianic Judaism (or with Messianic Judaism in general) here's a quick overview:
Messianic Judaism is basically made up of three different factions- Messianic Jewry, One Law Messianics and Two House Messianics.
Messianic Jewry is exactly what it sounds like- Jews who believe that Yeshua is the Messiah. They still practive Judaism just like all other religious Jews. Like mainstream Judaism, they believe that Judaism (Torah obserance, holy days, etc.) is for Jews and don't really attempt to encourage gentiles to participate. They follow the rabbinical halacha, just as any other Jew would.
One Law Messianics are those who believe that anyone who follows Yeshua (Jesus) ought to be Torah observant (although most seasoned believers don't try to push that on other people). This is regardless of ethnicity or anything else. Usually this group has respect for traditional Judaism and rabbinical authority, however they may or may not adhere to traditions or oral torah.
Two House Messianics believe that the Christian church is primarily made up of the lost tribes of Israel. Therefore because most Christians are Israelites, they should be Torah observant. By and large this group is also anti-rabbinical/anti-Judaism and leans toward a Karaite perspective. They are largely made up of ex-Pentecostal Christians (which is evident if you talk to them).
Malachi and I are One Law. We also adhere to the rabbinical authority. Our preference for practice is basically identical to Conservative Judaism. We have had no luck finding a congreagtion that is One Law and practices Judaism. We're been to over 20 congregations and there's nothing worthwhile for us anywhere. The place we've been going is full of very nice people but they're forcefully Two House and purposely want to stick it to Judaism by rabbi-trashing, casuallly using The Name and by intentionally breaking halachich rules because they believe they can.
So Malachi and I went congregation hunting. We found a lot of other blah places and finally a gem- a synagogue, staffed by a rabbi, where they use the Artscroll siddur, speak Hebrew and *gasp* uphold halacha! We were thrilled. However, they're not of the belief that everyone ought to keep Torah. Well, at first we just let it go and kept living how we felt was right for us, but then we had Ziva. Now we have a problem, because although we are as observant as any Jew in the synagogue we aren't Jews, which will mean Ziva won't get a bat mitzah and neither will any of our other future kids. That's not okay by me. If my kids are Torah observant and living religious lives, they shouldn't get shafted from bar or bat mitzvahs.
So the rabbi suggests we convert. Convert to what exactly? Well, Messianic Judaism, if you can believe that. Hmm... I thought we were practicing Messianic Judaism already. Well, we are, but we aren't Messianic Jews (of course) we're gentiles.
Their positon is that gentiles just have to be Christians and Jews have to be Messianic and Torah observant. So Ziva can't be a daughter of the commandments because, well, she doesn't have any commandments to fulfill. It really pisses me off.
I get Judaism's purpose in doing this. It's a halachich stanndard designed to protect the faith and the people. However, the NT seems pretty clear that there is no "Jew or gentile" and that the wall of partition is broken down.
Here's my deal- in the Tanakh where conversion pushers get their ammo, there was no option but to convert. The Hebrews had the Torah and monotheism and if you wanted on board you had pack up and move with them. You couldn't just say a prayer and sign up for the newsletter. Either you were Israel (and thereby a covenant member) or you weren't. And being Israel meant being religious and Torah observant. You wouldn't have some immigrant strolling down the street with a cart selling tamales. There wouldn't be some schulb doing animals and whatnot in the middle of everything. You obey, you leave or you die. Welcome to a theocracy.
Today, there is no Israeli theocracy. There are more secular Jews than religious ones and Messianic Jewry is at most 5-10% of the total. Being a Jew no more means being Torah obserant than being a gentile means being a pagan. Sure, there are cases, but you can no longer have that expectation of the masses. So why do I have to become a Jew? What am I proving and to whom? And why is it that a secular Jew could bounce into the shul at age 12 and get religious and get a bar mitzvah the following year, but my daughter who will have been practicing Judaism since birth will get robbed of a bat mitzvah (should she choose to continue in it as an adult)? Ethnicity no longer means anything.
So what am I doing with a conversion? Am I converting so I can do Torah? No. I'm already doing Torah. Am I converting so I can follow Yeshua? No. The NT plainly states that gentiles are welcome to folow him. Am I converting so I will be accepted into Judaism? HAHAHAHA. No. So why am I converting? So my SYNAGOGUE will accept my kids. I am converting so Ziva can proudly get up at age 12 and become a daughter of the commandments. So my kids won't have to sit in the shul watching everyone else get bar and bat mitzahs and get jack shit. Apparently, my synagogue has higher standards than G-d.
You know, it would make sense if I believed that gentiles got to skate past the Torah. It would make sense if I were moving to Israel. But like this? No way. It would be like me applying for French citizenship. Am I moving to France? No. But I want to be able to eat French food, celebrate Bastile Day and shower less. Well here's a blessing- you can do that without being a French citizen, so why would you give up your current citizenship for nothing?
On top of the fact that I don't have to, I believe thant gentiles have a role in the kingdom. Wouldn't I be forfeiting my role by converting?
Anyway, I'm pissed off about this whole thing. If we gentiles aren't good enough we shouldn't be allowed to participate in anything else. If we're good enough to come every week, to celebrate the holy days, to study with, etc. why are we cut out of this thing? It's crap. They should've check our ethnicities at the door and escorted us out from the start.
And meanwhile Madonna celebrated Rosh Hashanah in Israel with Shimon Peres.
And the 10 days of Awe are upon us and I'm so damn mad I don't want to go back to the synagogue.
"For Your Name signifies Your praise: hard to anger and easy to appease, for You do not wish the death of one deserving death, but that he repent from his way and live. Until the day of his death You await him; if he repents You will accept him immediately.
"It is true that You are their Creator and You know their inclination, for they are flesh and blood. A man's origin is from dust and his destiny is back to dust, at risk of his life he earns his bread; he is likened to a broken shard, withering grass, a fading flower, a passing shade, a dissipating cloud, a blowing wind, flying dust, and a fleeting dream.
"But You are the King, the Living and Enduring G-d."There is no set span to Your years and there is no end to the length of Your days. It is impossible to estimate the angelic chariots of Your glory and to elucidate Your Name's inscrutability. Your Name is worthy of You and You are worthy of Your Name, and You have included Your Name in our name.
