Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Pissing and Moaning About Work... I Know- Already??

Its so frustrating to me that we Americans have to have our butts kissed everytime we go out. In other non-Western countries if you need something you just go out and buy it. You don't ask a bunch of questions, you don't complain about the condition of the store, you don't expect people to be smiley and accommodating. You just get your crap and go home. Even if you did wish the service was better or whatever, you knew (as did the store) that you didn't have any other options, so you suck it up and you move on.
Here in America we have to be coddled and supported throughout our shopping trips. If the lights are too dim or too bright, or the employees bother us too much or ignore us, or if we don't like the price, the selection, the store hours, the reurn policy, the lines, the music playing or the distance from the parking lot to the door we'll leave and go someplace else.
Now I like to be treated well just as much as the next shopper, but every day I work retail I shake my head in disbelief at the audacity and spoiled rotten behavior I have to put up with. If I'm rushing down the aisle to attend to one whiny "guest" I'll have two others grabbing at my apron strings on the way. It doesn't matter if I'm on the phone, helping someone else or removing my apron and pulling out my keys to leave- people will whine and fuss and expect me to serve them.
Our store policy to to call our customers "guests" and to make them feel welcome and invited into our store. But how many guests would tear up their host's stuff, leave horrible messes and have the nerve to complain about anything after it all?? What guest would let their children run amok knocking things down and causing a commotion? Would you take something off of your host's shelf, lay it out on the floor and then leave it there? Would you pull something that belonged to your host apart and then dump it somewhere else in their house? Would you bring your filthy, nasty rat-dog into your host's house and set it on their furniture? And do you think that if you were repulsive enough to do these things that your host would want you to come back? No. No one save a classless clod would do these things. I wouldn't treat a state park that way. However, all day long people treat customer service worker like this with no clue that they should have a little respect.
Do you think it's easy to smile and pretend to give a crap about everybody and to happily accommodate the most ludicris of requests after you been standing, walking, kneeling, squatting, reaching, climbing, lifting and kissing up to people for 8 effing hours making crap for money and getting no thanks or appreciation for any of it? Do you think anybody working retail really cares if the comforter is for your daughter who just go accepted to UW or if the towels are for the guest room of your new condo? Do you think anybody making 9 bucks an hour to lick people's butts wants to hear you talk about how you need a massager for your back or a pillow for your jaccuzzi or a memory foam mattress topper because you ache after a long day at the office? NO!
The fact of the matter is for most store employees customers are an unwanted nuissance. Sure, somebody at the corporate level wants you to show up and spend your money on the crap we're selling. But for the girl behind the counter, the guy in the freight room out back and the sales rep escorting you from bed skirt to measley bed skirt we really just wish you'd get your crap and get out. We don't make any more or less money if you buy the Egyptian cotton versus the flannel. We don't care which towels or rugs you pick- we just want you to quit unfolding our crap and buy something. Sad, but true.
Here are some instances that really make me mad:
We have every color of every towel in every size displayed for guests to see and touch, yet every effing person has to unfold each and every towel they are considering. And do they fold it and put it back? OF COURSE NOT! They wad it up and dump it in the first open spot they see. Or they drag it around until they find something better and then dump it there. Or they leave it on the floor. They don't care.
This condescending loser asks me to climb a 10 foot ladder to get her a sheet set she can't reach. The offensive part is that there is an identical set sitting in front of her within reach. However she doesn't want that one because it is partially unzipped and she doesn't know if it has all the pieces. So I take it, I open it and I pull out every piece. It's all there. Oh but she still can be made to take that one because it was opened at one point. Jerkoff. Do you not realize that most of our day is spent putting thinkg back into theirbags, wrappers or boxes because people pull stuff out? Newsflash- most the stuff you buy wasprobably pulled out of it's package and dumped on the floor at some point. Deal with it.
The lame, pampered princesses who ask me to hand them this comforter or that rug. They of course can't lift it because they're pregnant. So I pick up the crap and ask them when they're due. "September," they smile. "Oh, congradulations," I smile back. "I'm due in March. You have a nice day now."
People who ask stupid questions should be released through a trap door into a pit of sharks. This guys asks me if I would buy a pair of shams he's holding for sixty dollars, with some sort of cocky, ass-face look. "No," I think to myself. "I work here for a living. If I want sixty-dollar shams I'd have to steal them." Then he goes on to tell me that Bill Gates makes a lot of money but he probably wouldn't buy them. Here's an idea, lame-wipe: DON'T BUY THEM!!!! If you don't want to shell out 60 bucks for bed decorations, what the hell are you doing in Linens N Things? GO AWAY!
Along those same lines, why be surprised when we tell you a comforter set is $249.99 or a sheet set for an extra deep matress is $129.99? Our competitors are Bed, Bath and Beyond, Macy's, JCPenney's and Sears. We do not compete with Wal-Mart, K-Mart, Liquidation World, Goodwill or EBay. If you "don't care about color, style or quality," as one customer told me then why are you here? You won't find 100 thread count cheap sheets here! You won't find $5 dollar crusty towels here! You won't find McCooking products here! If you want cheap stuff go to Wal-Mart! "Oh, I don't shop at places like Wal-Mart," the guest told me...
I'm pregnant. However the customers don't care. They will unroll an 80 pound rug, look at it, leave it, move down the aisle and watch as I whimper and grimace, easing myself down to the floor, leaning over my belly to roll the rug back up and them pull myself back to my feet, holding my stomach, stoop to pick up the rug and struggle to stuff it back into it's place on the shelf. And if it doesn't fit- surprise, surprise!- they will watch as I do it all over again and have the nerve to pull some other crap down or ask me to get a ladder and get something for them. They only words I have for this are profanity. You get the idea though.
Well, I guess that's enough for now, but the next time you're out shopping remember this post and give the store employees a break. Leave the store in no worse condition then when you found it. Treat the employees with the same respect they show you. Say please and thank you if someone is helping you. Chances are they don't want to and it will make them despise you much less. If you aren't satisfied with something tell a manager- not the poor slob unpacking boxes in a random deptartment. Chances are that person will just think you're a bitch and they won't tell anybody or do anything about your problem anyway. A manager hasn't been kissing up all day and they might have it in them to help you. Just be nice. It's not so much to ask.
Thank you and have a nice day.
Kristi